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Frumpy Days

Updated: Oct 16, 2023

Have you ever had one of those days where you just feel…frumpy?

Frumpy is the word I use to describe the overwhelming feeling of not having it together. This could be physically, emotionally, mentally or a combination of all three. Maybe dry shampoo has been used one too many days in a row, caffeine is the only thing keeping sluggishness at bay, moodiness and emotions shift with every request from each child, or the pants are pressing tighter against the flesh than normal.

On one of these particularly frumpy days, my husband walked in after work and made a comment as he passed by, expressing how beautiful he thought I was.

I shrugged with a heavy sigh and rolled my eyes in complete disbelief. “I don’t feel that way AT ALL today.” The beliefs in my head were so far from that train of thought.

His response to my matter-of-fact statement took me by surprise. “Well, your opinion and thoughts about yourself don’t determine mine.”

I’ve thought back to that moment several times. It reminds me of the way God continually sees us and pursues us as His daughters, despite the way we feel about ourselves. If you are like me, you are tempted to believe that the love and adoration God has for us is based on our outward actions or what we offer him. We expect our messiness and lack of having it together to repel a beautiful, perfect, holy God.

Dane Orthund in the book “Gentle and Lowly” writes:

“The sins of those who belong to God open the floodgates of his heart of compassion for us. The dam breaks. It is not our loveliness that wins his love. It is our unloveliness. Our hearts gasp to catch up to this. It is not how the world around us works. It is not how our own hearts work. But we bow in humble submission, letting God set the terms by which he will love us.”

Where our unloveliness and sin would naturally evoke rejection and judgment from people, we have a God who is not like man. The truth is that we are His, and He looks on us, with all of our unlovely, frumpy ways, and leans in with compassion, love and delight because of who He is.

Even if you don’t have someone who reassures you on your worst days, you have a God who does. It is in His secure, unwavering love that you can rest and find complete satisfaction for every longing in your heart. Sometimes, you just need to be reminded that He never chose you based on your best days or what you had to offer Him. He chose you because He is love and you are His masterpiece.

Your Fellow Able Mom,

Magen Thetford

Lord, thank You for the way You love us so fully, even on our worst days. Thank You for reorienting our hearts to the truth that Your love and acceptance of us can never be based on what we have done to deserve or earn it. Help us to rest in this as secure daughters. Amen.

Connect with Magen,

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