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From Hurtful Words to Helpful Word

Updated: Oct 16, 2023

“So give your father and mother joy! May she who gave you birth be happy”

(Proverbs 23:25 NLT)

It was a difficult parenting day. It was one of those days where you can’t help but wonder who signed you up for this job with this particular child.

My teenage son had spent several days being prohibited from using his cellphone due to not honoring my cell phone curfew. I walked past him looking at my apple watch and into his eyes hoping that form of non-verbal communication would be enough for him. But he completely ignored my signals and warnings. I was simply worn out from having to be the cellphone police; so taking it from him gave me a few days of relief.

But that Monday morning, his frustration collided with mine, and our conversation ended with words spoken in anger that shocked me and hurt my heart deeply. When he arrived at school, he sent me an email apologizing, but I wasn’t ready to accept. I thanked him for the apology, and we sent several e-mails trying to better understand one other.

All day I tried to work, but I struggled to concentrate. My mind kept drifting off to what he said and for what reason he was not honoring my rules. That’s when I asked God for help and decided to dig into my Word before digging into my work. I said a quick prayer straight from the heart. “Lord, I need your help with this one. I don’t know what to do.” Then I started to journal. Once I finished, I opened my Bible and landed on Proverbs 23:35.

At first, I didn’t know what God was trying to say because I clearly was not a happy or joyful mother at the moment. So I sat the Bible down and thought about what I had just read. What could it mean? That’s when I felt a nudge to look down again. And on the page next to that passage was a daily devotional titled “Entrusting Children to God.”

My heart sank as I realized that God had turned me right to the page that would answer my prayer. I hadn’t been studying the book of Proverbs, nor was I thinking I'd find what I needed so quickly. But God knew because God knows all.

After reading that devotional, I sent my son a message letting him know that I forgave him and that I needed to let God heal my hurts from those words. It’s important that our children know that we are human and that they know the weight of their words. We exchanged “I Love You” and continued about our day.

Can I tell you something? There will be moments as a mother that seem emotionally unbearable. Your children will say and do things that remind you of their humanity as well as your own. You may respond in a less than loving way, or you may not respond at all. Sometimes they will present you with challenges you never thought you would have to face, but God is parenting with you. He knew it would happen, and He knows how to carry you through.

This is why we can have joy and be happy; because we are not parenting without help from the Perfect Parent. When we spend time with God, we invite Him into our day which invites Him into both the easy and difficult parts of it as well. It’s true that parenting does not come with a handbook, but it can come with a helper, the Holy Spirit, if we allow Him to journey with us. So let’s begin to partner with God in our parenting. He knows just what we need to parent well.

Your fellow Able Mom,

Rachel G. Scott

Father, we entrust our children to you. Please help us to see them and love them as You do.

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